Reflections

This past Friday I was speaking with a couple of friends about our career aspirations. We talked about consulting, finance, entrepreneurship, and high-tech.

Then that led into discussing what we enjoyed the most. Before I knew it, I found myself talking about how much I loved having the opportunity to lead small groups and teach Sunday Schools.

But why? There are many reasons...the most commonly heard are:
- I enjoy serving others
- I like being able to influence how people think
- Its nice to be able to speak and communicate information

For me a huge part of my enjoyment in leading small group or teaching was how the bible study or lesson ministered to me personally.

First, for those hours of preparation - those hours were a means of grace from God to me. I remember reading about A.W. Tozer writing "The Pursuit of God" literally on his knees - praying and communing with God as he wrote. That set the example for me...I wanted preparation to be a time of deep, sweet, intimate communion with God. I wanted to taste and believe what I was going to say before I went before the class.

Second, the actual teaching itself. The first level of teaching is conveying information - prepping slides and being clear about what one is trying to say. But for me, there would come a time in the teaching itself when I would just get really convicted - and therein would be the passionate, personal plea to the class about what was being taught. That, to me, is even more of God's grace being granted to me...that I would be able to not just intellectually agree, but whole-heatedly believe in what I'm saying in a worshipful way.

Third, and lastly...after the teaching itself, I loved taking time to reflect on the lesson. To think over how the teaching or study went. And thank God for the good moments, and trust God that He'll work even through the bad moments. Then finally to commit it all to God, for He alone ultimately is the one who changes lives - and find rest in that.

All this to say, I think a huge motivation for our desire to lead, particularly in leading studies or teaching or preaching, is our own benefit and means of grace and sanctification that we receive from God while doing so.